Friday, March 3, 2006
Are You Gay?
In Sunday's
SF Chron, Eric Hegedus
urges journalists to ask celebrities about their sexual orientation.
Hegedus is the national president of the
National Lesbian and Gay Journalists Association. He says:
Reporting on sexual orientation and gender identity -- perceived or otherwise, whether in life or postmortem -- should be included and dealt with the same way we approach subjects for such basic information as whether they are married, divorced, single or dating. This is an important part of providing a full measure of an individual's life, one we should stop avoiding.
Hegedus and many other journalists are concerned about innuendo surrounding Olympic figure skater Johnny Weir, who was described as flamboyant and fabulous and fantastic. All potential code words for gay. Many observers have pointed out that none of the journalists with access to Weir were brave enough to report whether they asked the skater the question. Outsports.com had a good
roundup of thoughtful commentary and criticism.
I've taught at the NLGJA convention for the past three years. Last fall I moderated a panel of writers who discussed the difficulties they encounter when writing about a gay man or a lesbian posthumously. Hedegus wrote a
column that captured the complexity of the issue. It was during that discussion that
Hank Stuever, of
The Washington Post, pointed out that the problem is not just with journalists, refusing to ask. There are many prominent entertainers, politicians and athletes who are deliberately vague about their sexual orientation, even when asked. Obituary writers came under significant
criticism for not including sexual orientation in the obituaries of people like Susan Sontag, Ismail Merchant and Luther Vandross.
Many reporters, particularly straight reporters, worry that asking about sexual orientation is applying a double standard. Are we asking them about their sex lives or about who they really are? It seems the answer might be in the question itself. Asking, "Who have you had sex with?" is different than saying, "Tell me about your last significant relationship." A reporter might say, "Tell me about your ideal partner." Or "Describe the kind of mate that attracts you." Even these questions imply a certain bias against singlehood.
Still, a good question can open the door to the closet, yet leave it up to the source to decide whether to step out.
I'm not sure about the "Are you gay?" question that Hegedus recommends. Yes it's irresponsible to hint and wink in your published work. But there are only a handful of public figures like Weir who seem to beg the question. That's a problematic stereotype in itself. I've met many men who fit the same stereotype. They're married. To women. If I were doing a profile of such a man, should I ask him if he's gay?
Being gay includes so many varieties of private and public acceptance, I'm not sure there's a hard and fast rule. Some gay people are out in all facets of their lives, some are out and yet very discreet. Some are out at work, but not to their families and vice versa. Some gay people are deep in the closet. And some gay people live double lives.
I agree with Hegedus, journalists should ask more questions and give sources more opportunities to discuss intimate and important matters. I'm just not sure exactly what those questions should be.
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