Doc’s Swimsuit Issue

Dear Readers:

Dr. Ink’s culturally alert sidekick Larry Larsen informs the Doc that National Geographic has published its first swimsuit issue. February seems to be the month for swimsuit issues, a marketing tradition invented by Sports Illustrated, and copied to the point of saturation.

Perhaps it was once true that frozen Northerners needed a jolt of gorgeous skin to liberate their minds from the cabin fever of winter. But with Maxim magazine and soft core channels like Cinemax and “Girls Gone Wild” promos, not to mention the regular home delivery of countless Victoria’s Secret catalogues and Internet porn and public flashing by women showing off their implants… In short, Doc wonders if American culture isn’t hootered out.

Not according to the cover of National Geographic, which offers a delicately submerged model sporting three seashells connected by string. This tease is slightly misleading, promising “100 years of pictures” of swimsuits, most of which are unlikely to appeal to prurient interest. The online description promises that “The special, newsstand-only, issue takes a detailed look at people wearing swimsuits, but without quite the titillation some other magazines muster.”

The “newsstand-only” designation not only brings in more income, but protects the issue from prudish parents, librarians, preachers, or school board members who are subscribers.

Truth be told, many men of Dr. Ink’s generation (but not the Doc, of course) got their first look at female nudity from the pages of National Geographic. Those peeks were rare enough in the 1950s to be truly exciting. Ahhh, those were the days.